Challenge: And You Wait For Me
by Heaven is Drunk
Summary: Challenge Songfic: Death had been a welcome end to his tragedy. But, after meeting her, he couldn't stop himself from wanting to breathe again. Hakkai X OC.


**Title: ** And You Wait For Me**  
Type: **Saiyuki one-shot, songfic, challenge-fic**  
Genre: **Romance/General (Sorry Repentless Wind, I don't know if I can make it too funny)**  
Pairing: ** Cho Hakkai X OC**  
Characters: **Cho Hakkai, Sha Gojyo, and broad list of original characters**  
Story Placement:** prior to series, in the middle of the 3 year time period from the first meeting to actually leaving**  
Background:** If you have read the 4th book of a novel and scene episodes like 10-12 or something then you don't need the background. But I suppose it would be Hakkai's sister was rapped, he killed some 1000 youkai and became one himself then she commits suicide. He becomes a criminal so he meets Sanzo and Goku. Tada! Phew…**  
Plot:** He hadn't planned to meet her, no one ever plans these things, but he knows that loosing her will be far more painful than anything else in this world.**  
Disclaimer: ** I don't own the song nor Hakkai because that would be an xmas present to Repentless Wind. However, I do own my OC and I make her do whatever I want her to do…(*mysterious bat from the corner hits author*)…ouch…bitch…**  
Warnings: **Eh, sexual references as usual because I feel like it.**  
Author's Note:** So I have been hooked on Whatcha Say by Jason Derulo but because I just could not get a plot with that song, I challenged Repentless Wind to do it and then she challenged me to write this in response. She's not too good with the challenges (way too broad and not a subject that is easy for me to write) but I'll try my best. I hope you enjoy.

Suggestion: Listen to Wait for Me by Theory of a Deadman while reading this story please.

* * *

**And You Wait For Me  
By Heaven is Drunk**

_You are not alone tonight  
Imagine me there by your side  
It's so hard to be here so far away from you  
I'm counting the days till  
I'm finally done_

Happy moments in his life were like reading Shakespeare's tragedies backwards. The pain, the sadness…the tragedy, was all at the beginning of his life. The joy, the love,…life was at the end of his life. At an age where nostalgia was all that was left, he could look back, skim through the small, dramatic play and smile when his eyes finally closed.

The moments his eyes finally closed was something he'd imagined over and over in the beginning. Death was a long, wasted moment of obsession. Like Hamlet obsessed over his father's death, Hakkai's youth was spent thinking of how he'd die and who would miss him. Did he want a death drenched in gore, in the middle of battle, amongst a mass of bodies, or solitude, a death that was simple a disappearance? Did he want a fake, sobbing funeral where, once his body was burned to ash, no one would cry? Or did he long for a spectacle; a widow screaming and clutching his dead body?

As he stared into the blood red apple, imagining the color being the same as the blood still all over the castle floor, the mountain side, and Gojyo's bed sheets, he found himself obsessively curious if the death he'd almost succumbed to would be the one he wanted. He'd be with Kanan again, lovers rejected in life but together for all eternity in the heavenly future; a true Romeo and Juliet. However, here he stood, unable to take the fruit cutting knife resting lazily on the shop owner's table and jab it into his jugular. In fact, he couldn't even get himself to stop breathing; he'd read that death by suffocation was like falling asleep…life just stops.

A cold, wet substance dripped on his head, alerting his emerald green eyes to reality. He looked to the sky curiously, the ominous color shadowed over what had been a moderately cloudy morning. He shrugged, unconcerned by one drop from the sky. One drop was not a need to run to shelter.

Before his thoughts could return to the sharp edges that surrounded him, the apple before him seemed to cry. A single, cold drop fell down from the top to the bottom, joined by another and another. But three drops didn't mean the overcast would burst into a rainstorm, it didn't mean he had to run back to the cold apartment that smelled of smoke.

Almost on cue, the cloud burst and a cold sheet of rain fell to the ground. In a flash, the streets were nearly empty and the shops had closed down. Hakkai had remained froze, attempting not to seem crazy by laughing hysterically at his foolishness, and holding the same red apple. He should have known it was going to rain.

He held his stomach protectively as he took a bite of his prize for being soaked through and through and walked almost leisurely through the empty streets. He hadn't realized he was walking away from the apartment until the street looked far more residential. He cursed softly to himself and then took another bite of his apple.

The ominous gray set the tone for this moment. A moment burning stronger than the bloody bodies, the pain of transformation, or any haunting visions he'd see in his future travels.

Through the haze of falling rain and the deafening silence of an empty street, he could hear a rhythmic pounding. It was deeper, heavier than the rain hitting the ground. There was a coupled sound, heavy breathing, muttered curses, and Hakkai suddenly knew he wasn't alone on this street.

His heart leapt in excitement at potential human contact. A person who wouldn't judge like Cho Gonou had been. But he retracted that statement, he'd been carried through the town with his guts hanging out, he'd been dragged out of this town handcuffed to a grumpy blonde monk and his childish companion, and now he was back with a strange monocle and the habit of holding his stomach randomly. The town had been generally weary of him and he feared a reputation for being…a weirdo. Walking alone in the rain and begging directions from a town's person would probably label him a rapist or stalker in a second. So now his heart felt heavy and anxious as the sounds became a shape.

It was a female, which scared him more, but she seemed inclined to continue her break-neck speed through the heavy rain. Her deep black hair, soaked and clinging to her forehead and scalp, she had pale skin, ashen by the poor light of a rainy day and a black uniform. The baggy black shirt hid whatever evidence of her feminity could be seen through her body and the loose white skirt was complemented by black, baggy pants underneath. But, without the clues clothes brought, he knew this stranger whose black slippers splashed in puddles, soaking the legs more and eliciting a hiss from their wearers, and clinging to a silver bucket filled with strange bottles and a cloth was indefinitely a female.

She was close enough now that he could call to her and he tried. His mouth opened and his hand gestured outward but the words never left his mouth. Something electrified him, froze him in his place and caused the fresh scar to ache in a numb reminder of his past.

Her eyes were the same color as the rain that poured from the sky, so much like the drops of water that the had blended into the falling surroundings. Eyes like the rain and rain had become such an enemy to him.

He turned from her, attempting to seem like he wasn't trying to get her attention but it had been to late. He turned half way towards a house when her running slowed. He heard it in the clonking and splashing that had accord with every footfall. The clanking bucket quieted and soon, all noise was the rain falling and her heavy breathing.

"C-can I help you?" She panted from his back left. He looked over his shoulder, his eyes immediately focused on her eyes then decidedly straining down her soft, round face to the thin, long neck that held it up over her broad shoulders. If he hadn't been so decided on this person being a girl, he could have…would have seen her as a boy and he tried to turn his mind into that thought.

Her wide eyes stared at him curiously, pleasantly. Her cheeks were pink from the exertion and her mouth was slightly agape to allow more air to pass. A fleeting moment of male hormones drove right down his spine and sparked something more shocking than the dull throb in his gut. He believe later that it wasn't the deceptively innocent way she'd stared at him, like a child starring at a pretty flower; it had to been all of those talks with Gojyo that had turn her image into a sex kitten.

"Uhhh…" He muttered eloquently and then physically hit his palm to his forehead in exasperation. That was not a charming first line that Gojyo would have delivered and undeniably, this girl had probably received several from him.

She giggled, a soft, bell-like sound that made all the joy and laughter from Kanan seem fake and dirty. Gojyo would call this girl corruptible.

He'd have to keep the red haired kappa far, far, far away from this one.

"You seem lost and it isn't healthy to stand here in the rain." She stepped around his tall, broad shoulders to face him face on. She was nearly as tall as him and her stance was so…angelic, "I can show you, as long as we find someplace dry."

He nodded numbly and she pulled on his sleeve to make him move to an awning. They stood underneath the small blue cover, too close for Hakkai to breath. She smelled of a clean house, a well cooked meal, and the rain falling in spring. He glanced down at her bucket to notice it had been all cleaning supplies. So her smell was from her job and this tussled, seductive appearance was running through the rain. If he saw her in the future, the temptation rolling off of her so obviously to him, so subtly to her would not be present.

She shook out her hair, revealing a scar in the same shape as the rain crying from the sky. He was enraptured by the mark, attempting to hide his stare. She glanced at him sideways, the blue intensity dulling when not directly aimed at him, "You don't seem like the suburban type of man. Where were you headed?"

"I was g-going home." He watched as drops of water fell down her slim neck, causing her to shiver. He tried to stifle his groan.

"And where is home?" she smiled warmly, brightly, like the sun he longed for. She was so…interesting.

"Um, an apartment complex nears a bar." He offered, looking away so he could form a coherent picture in his mind to describe to her.

She gave him a flat look that still looked so innocent, so carefree, empty of all animosity, or was it that her glare was just not as brutal as the violet eyes as Sanzo. She sighed and turned to him and he took back that thought, the look wasn't less intense, she was just not facing him completely and showing off that silly pout on her thin, cherry colored lips, "You'll have to elaborate a little more, Mister…"

"Cho G…Hakkai," He held out a shaky hand and she smiled brightly at him and grasped his hand far more tightly than he thought she could do. He hid his shock with a soft grin.

"I'm Ara, Cho-san." She fixed her hair again and looked up towards the sky, "You're lucky that I live in the business district. I'll be able to take you to Bar Street or until you get your bearings, okay?"

He nodded and looked up to the sky too, "The rain seems to be breaking up."

She smiled softly, "Sadly yes. It was just an afternoon shower."

He wondered curiously why she seemed upset by that but the haze of the cold rain faded away and she once again grasped his sleeve and darted out into the sprinkling. She seemed to glow in the gray haze and the way her eyes lit like lightning as she skipped through the rain made the ache in his scar become bearable. She pushed her straight bangs left and right until they laid in a straight line over her forehead. Then she fixed the slight curl that the shoulder length hair had fixed itself into; and Hakkai couldn't stop starring.

"Are you new here?" She offered, a pink hue still present on her cheeks, lighting the dark scar in a truly adorable way, "I could show you the right way back to your apartment on my day off."

He couldn't help but laugh, "I was lost in thought," he offered subtly, "No, I'm not so new to this place, just unfamiliar with it."

The same flat look was sent his way but, now expecting its strange hardness, he found it endearing on her angelic face, "Being unfamiliar with something does mean you were recently introduced to it, correct?"

He smiled at her, turning his head to look straight at her and he could almost feel the reaction burn through her skin and shiver up her spine. Her pink cheeks, now a rusty rouge color, was not because of the chill of the air or the exercise she'd had.

They were attracted to each other.

"Alright," She stretched a hand out to a row of dimly lit pubs, "Here is Bar Street, anything familiar?"

He frowned before catching one of Gojyo's frequent stops. He smiled and nodded appreciatively, "My room mate often visits that place."

She smiled brightly, nodded, and pivoted on her heel, tripping just a little, almost unnoticeably, "Okay, Well, it was nice to meet you Cho-san. Please, don't get lost."

She stepped away from Bar Street, slowly, almost in a way to give him time to get her attention again. He took the hint and grabbed her thin wrist, feeling an edging, a rawness in her skin but favored focusing on her enigmatic eyes, "When is your tour, Ara-san?"

She chuckled, a heady, lower octave chuckle and he could only assume this had been a real laugh. The other, lighter was something friendly to waywardly guide someone to not notice her. It was far too late for him to ignore her in favor of some girlish bar maid. She turned to him, purposely not detaching his hand from her wrist, "Just Ara is fine," He nodded, elated and light-headed from the honor, "Tomorrow, at 2, how about in front of this street, okay?"

He smiled, a stretch that was unfamiliar and real, she returned with a smile that nearly blinded him. He reluctantly let her go and watched as she disappeared into the growing crowd of consumers and sellers. He stood almost 10 minutes longer before a liquidly voice filled with brandy and lust awoke him from his thoughtless stare, "Yo, Hakkai, what the hell ya doing out here and soaking wet?"

* * *

"_Another_ date with this mysterious Ara?" Gojyo sighed from the kitchen table, picking at a plate of noodles that had gotten cold. He favored his cigarette and the third bottle of beer. Hakkai cleaned his own dish slowly, waiting patiently for Gojyo to finish so he could clean the plate. Gojyo wouldn't do it himself, he'd wait until mold became life, "When do I get to meet her?"

"When I know she can handle you." He smiled softly, she seemed fragile and innocent. He refused to corrupt her with his incestuous touch, though she put herself in the position of seeing him more than just once. But he'd be damned twice over before she'd meet the lecherous and far more attractive…experience kappa.

"Please," Gojyo rolled his eyes and took a drag, "She's you're girlfriend I won't hit on her until 6 months after you break up."

Hakkai chuckled, "That is very comforting, Gojyo. Finish your dinner, I have to go soon."

Gojyo batted his hand, "Go, go, I'll clean up," Hakkai hesitated for a second before Gojyo's dark stare turned to him, "It's impolite to keep a girl waiting."

Hakkai nodded and, after cleaning and giving himself a less tussled and wild look, left for their evening rendezvous. It was their third date if he didn't include their first meeting and the tour. In fact, he'd embarrassedly asked for a real date while they were on the tour. She giggled in that heady, addicting chuckle and said simply,

_If I didn't want to go on a date with you, I wouldn't have offered to give you a tour._

She was waiting in the park for him, blushed cheeks and forcing herself not to look up. He paused in his movement, his breath stolen by whatever spell she had casted on him.

Her hair was curled lightly, bangs still a straight edged across her brow. Her eyes were glowing against the pale blue background of makeup and her skin radiated a seductive pink against the pale blue dress. It suited her almost too well, a loose but yet shoulder less piece that ended scantily above the knee, calves quickly covered by a pair of black boots. She sat on a black leather jacket, the same she'd worn over her plain brown dress on their "first date".

_This is how I really look,_ She said at first sight. She'd worn tight pants and a read, strapless shirt the previous date and he could tell she had not enjoyed any moment that she was in that outfit, _You'll have to like me looking like this. That other outfit was my room mate's idea._

He had almost kissed her then.

He was close to kissing her now. And he stopped himself because of one fact, he was now youkai and he couldn't destroy an angel that way.

She looked up at him, the rattling and chiming of her ornate locket corrupted the evening silence. Her eyes widened a fraction before she looked away, cheeks pink once more, "Um, Hi."

He chuckled, taking her scarred wrist he'd yet to ask about and lifting her off the bench, "I am sorry I'm late. I was waiting for Gojyo to finish dinner."

She smiled, "I left early so Setsuko wouldn't make me change my outfit…again…"

He laughed easily and moved his hand to grasp hers. She allowed him, her handing warming instantly as her stomach fluttered, "Hakkai, I-I'd like to meet Gojyo someday."

Hakkai frowned, meeting Gojyo was not possible. Him being the closest thing Hakkai had to family, meeting him not only meant commitment but a chance to scare away this perfect girl. Even worse, if Goku or Sanzo made their monthly check-ups at the same time, she'd be exposed to way to much, including his past. It was better she thought he was normal, innocent; not who he was.

She laughed it off, "Never mind, from the stories, he sounds like Setsuko and I would rather not meet someone exactly like her." She was light and airy in her voice, hiding the pain of rejection, "Come on, it's starting to get late and we'll miss the performers in the park."

She took a step, her hand slipping out of his and she turned back to him. She gave him an honest, concerned look and he could only think of the pain he'd caused, the blood spilled; a dead Kanan. She looked away, "You don't want to go on a date?" He froze in fear of the moment. How could he tell her he didn't want to corrupt her, take away all the innocence and angelic nature.

"My…Gojyo is a part of my past that…" Hakkai sighed. Ara smiled softly and took his arms. She gently, carefully, almost barely hugged him, "I want to get to know all of you, Hakkai. Don't be afraid."

He was suppose to tell her that. He shook his head, "Well, if you're going to know all of me, it's better that you meet my friends all at once. I'll send a message to them and when they arrive, I'll have you meet them, okay?"

She smiled so dazzlingly, purely overjoyed, that he felt his knees quake. Did all angels possess the power to weaken men like this? Was that how man stayed loyal to god, persuasion of these ethereal perfections put on earth and called lovers?

"When Setsuko isn't on the horny train, I'll have you meet her too." He laughed, taking her hand innocently as he could and walked towards the center of the park, "You know, she said that third dates were the sign to have sex."

He blushed, "Gojyo said the same thing."

Ara blushed and looked away, "Is…is that where you…"

Hakkai looked up to the stars, "N-Not unless you want to."

She chuckled, "We haven't even kissed yet."

He scratched his nose, enough observing Goku, "I…I don't want to corrupt you."

She snorted, normally unattractive but somehow so perfect on her. She stopped and turned to him, "Is that what all this is about?" He nodded, she sighed and patted his shoulders, "I'm not some breakable little girl, Hakkai. I have lived on my own for awhile."

He nodded, "But I'm sure there are things in your life you haven't encountered yet. Things a perfect woman like you wouldn't survive; creatures that could hurt you…I could hurt you."

She slapped him on the back, harder than he thought. He stifled his pained gasp, "We certainly can't have sex now." He frowned, "You hardly know me. When you stop thinking that, then we'll talk about sex."

He openly rubbed his numbing arm, "You want to have sex…with me…"

She turned away, stone silent and stiff. He grinned brightly, that was a 'yes'. He stroked her chin, bighting his lip to bleeding to not imagine blood dripping all over her gentle face. Starring into the haunting blue of her eyes made that easier. He lifted her chin up and leaned foreword quickly, he didn't want to get cold feet. His lips brushed hers, barely touching at first but the shock and feel sending a fire to areas that had gone into hibernation. She gently pulled him back to her lips and opened them just slightly, chaste and gentle and perfect like he knew her kiss would be.

* * *

He paced anxiously, Goku following clumsily. He had tried not to worry, keep calm and then clean every inch of the apartment…twice, which annoyed Sanzo. He then went to great lengths to keep Gojyo and Goku away form Sanzo and each other to keep Sanzo happy which made him even more angry.

"Look, Hakkai," Sanzo sighed, "You called me here to meet a girl, which I will kill you for." An empty threat from the gun-toting monk, he was happy to get out of monk duties and stuffy religious fanatics, "If you don't stop now that I'll shoot you before she shows up and all your anxiety will be wasted."

He stopped, starring at the odd insight Sanzo had expressed subtly and then sat down next to him at the table. He relaxed all of his muscles and attempted to convince himself that smoking one cigarette wasn't a bad thing. Gojyo stepped out of his room in everything but appropriate attire for meeting his best friend's girlfriend of 5 months and Hakkai almost passed out.

"I'm going to tell her everything tonight," Gojyo and Sanzo stared at him in shock, "I thought that all at once would be better."

"Stupid," Sanzo muttered, "But then you won't be a sap when she dumps you."

"You haven't even had sex with her!" Gojyo shrieked, pacing the room now, "What the he—"

A solid knock was heard at the door and he ran to it.

Goku bounced up and down behind him as he revealed a very comfortable looking Ara. She wore no make-up, her plain brown dressed was baggy and perfect to Hakkai, covered by the leather jacket. She held a plate of sweets in her hands and passed them irresponsibly to Goku so she could slip off her worn, brown cowboy boots. She stepped next to Hakkai and turned to the group, quickly memorizing each one.

"Okay, Ara…" Hakkai began but Ara smiled and stepped foreward. Her movements deliberate, controlled, and intense. She approached Gojyo first and for an intense second, she stared him down. He seemed to battle himself before a gentleman's smile graced his lips and he extended his hand, "Gojyo…" Hakkai muttered.

"Pleasure to meet you, Gojyo-san." She smiled in her typical, soft, airy way, her voice like a choir of angels singing Gojyo's praises for having his name, "I am Ara."

"Nice to meet you," He smiled charmingly and yet not flirtatiously, "I've heard a lot about the famous, perfect Ara."

"I have hear a lot about the playboy Gojyo," She said heavily, knowingly, in a way that Gojyo's face fell, ashamed, for a second before smiling as if he were speaking to an equal, "I'm glad the rumors are dirtier than the man." She turned to Sanzo and the monk glared at her. She smiled at him as if she hadn't seen the glare at all, "Genjyo Sanzo, correct? It is nice to meet you."

She held her hand out and he took it then stiffened as he realized what he'd done. He hissed, "Nice to meet you."

She turned an electrified grin towards Goku who'd cleaned her plate of sweets, "And you must be Goku! I should have brought more food."

"He doesn't need it," Sanzo and Gojyo muttered simultaneously. Ara grinned and chose to sit down next to Sanzo. Hakkai quickly came over, taking her hand gently, forcing the tension to ease away from his back. The night proceeded with an odd, relaxed mixture. Sanzo had nod bemoaned or hit anyone, he hadn't even smoked a cigarette. Gojyo, had once but went outside stiffly when Ara passed him a stiff smile. Although, he had not said one sexist or rude comment to or around her. Goku sat somewhat quietly, waiting for his turn to speak. He broke once or twice but a twitching finger from Ara silenced him.

They spoke of everything that night, the past slipping easily from everyone's lips with the influence of wine. Every second he'd been afraid of judgment but she smiled gently, laughed at the funny parts and squeezed his hand at the sad ones.

When the night was late, Hakkai smiled at his friends and walked Ara home. She expressed her joy with a light step and bright smile, "That was fun."

"I must be wrong about you," Hakkai chuckled, "They didn't argue once! Sanzo didn't smoke and Gojyo didn't say anything gross."

"I know how important it was for us to get along." Ara grinned up at him with a knowing look. It was borderline sinister and he had to blink to get rid of the idea and the slight fear it instilled, "I like them though they can be more natural around me too. I don't mind."

They approached her apartment complex and Ara turned to him with a soft blush, "Um, I want to thank you for trusting me so much."

Hakkai smiled, "Well, since it turned out so well, it was my pleasure."

She nodded, "okay…but really, you've told me everything and now I should do something for you."

She leaned foreward, lips puckered for a kiss but he stopped her, "That shouldn't be how it works."

She pouted clearly and he almost gave in, "B-but I wa-"

"Tell me about the scar," He caressed her wrist gently and she stiffened. She bit her lip and then sighed.

Her free hand found its way to the tear drop scar, "It was…rape…at knife point. I got this when I bit the assailant's arm. I was…angry and frightened. I ran away from home because…well, I was afraid of what they would say. Being damaged is a probably not a good selling point when you're trying to get good suitors."

Hakkai growled, "I'm sure—"

Her fingers touched his lips, "I thought that way. It took years for Setsuko to set me straight, but by then I had a life here and I didn't want to leave. I…I was depressed and alone…before I came here. I took my necklace and dug the edge into my wrist." She gestured and acted out the even, using the screw edge of the locket to make the 'x' mark, "I know it was stupid now but I still feel…dirty and used."

Hakkai nodded and hugged her tightly, "You'll always be pure to me. Pure, perfect, and angelic is what you are and nothing less."

She smiled into his shoulder and hugged him back, "I don't think you're friends will agree. I used all of my will power to glare at them."

Hakkai chuckled, "So…how about dinner at my place the next night you have off."

She nodded, kissed him chastely though he felt the edge of her tongue stroke his lips gently before she pulled away, flustered and panting, and escaped into her complex. He laughed to himself at her shy behavior and even more when both Sanzo and Gojyo confronted him upon his return and claimed she was a youkai. Goku asked when Hakkai would marry her.

* * *

The moments of joy melded into golden light, days passing quickly and contently as he learned more and more about Ara, loved more and more of her. She smiled unconditionally at every moment they were together. She was a warm, compatible presence that, even if she was not physically beside him, continued to cuddle him in those times of loneliness. He numbly realized after two years with her in his life, that the ache in his belly was something more electrifying, passionate and loving, not the cruel burn of a past mistake.

She would touch him gently, she would touch him passionately, devotedly and every brush alighted the fire of love in him. She was the one, the soul to match his soul and, though he loved Kanan, Ara was devotedly in love with him.

The ominous future hadn't affected him though in the latter days leading to his grand adventure, Ara seemed melancholy, attempting to cover sadness. All those moments of her silent reflection came to fruition shortly after an eventful night where her room mate happened to be out of the apartment all night.

They had been laying silently, blissful and at ease, when cries and screams were heard outside. He bounded out of the bed, almost shouting at her to remain in the apartment with the door locked, and ran from the building, throwing on clothes at the same time. He'd missed the worried pout on Ara's face as she was left alone to be concerned for her love and friend.

He'd rushed through the streets, dodging limbs and those running from whatever had threatened the town. There were clearly humans dodging bodies and loudly locking doors as they rushed into their homes. But what they were running from still baffled Hakkai. He glanced back and forth as he ran towards the screams, which was further and further out of town, things were suddenly apparent.

Bloody limbs were obviously gnawed on and the source was a razor toothed teen who was distracting himself with the pale, fragile wrist of a young woman. Hakkai almost threw up, the image of that frail wrist being that of Ara's though clearly this limb was not covered in the sensuous calluses like Ara's worn finger tips.

"Um, excuse me?" He coughed and the teen turned abruptly. Hakkai took a step back in surprise. It was a youkai, crazed, cannibalistic and has lost all sense of humanity. Hakkai felt the instinct to run, but if he did, this teen would surely find Ara and Hakkai couldn't let that happen.

The teen threw the arm aside, finding Hakkai more appetizing than a dead limb. He charged teeth first and Hakkai instinctively punch, forcing the boy's jaw to break with a chakra enhanced fist.

The teen fell to the ground, holding his jaw and bemoaning, "Wait 'til ma hears about this you bastard!"

"Children shouldn't speak like that…" Hakkai muttered but his thoughts were racing ahead of him. Youkai ran in packs and if this teen had lost it, the parents, siblings and relatives certainly had lost it as well, "ARA!"

He went running, faster than he had when Kanan was stolen, more desperately than when he was dying. Hakkai felt his lungs burn and his mind go blank; his vision became red the more he thought of innocent, beautiful Ara's body mangled and broken.

He wasn't going to watch it all again.

To his shock, the town wasn't much quieter than when he had left. There were the sounds of screaming, a single young woman crying in fear, and the hungry growls of youkai. It struck him cold in his place, Ara was being attacked.

"SHIT!" That was her voice, frustrated and in pain. The realization sent him running blindly towards the apartment. He found the group easily and was startled into his place behind them.

It was like a dance, watching her duel with a thin blade. She moved rhythmically, slipping periodically with her natural, endearing clumsiness, but she had managed to kill one. She took wide stances to protect Setsuko who was cradling an obviously broken arm. Hakkai some how knew that they were safe.

Ara looked…dangerous, her eyes the same as a stormy sky in the middle of it's highest point. She'd cleared a safe distance but was bleeding from her upper thigh. A youkai had caught her and Hakkai was going to make them pay.

He felt his blood boil, his bones crack and move in a sickening way that made him well aware that he was no longer human. He charged, seeing red figuratively and soon, as his elongated claws ripped right through the chest of a youthful female youkai, he was literally seeing the red. The fight hardly lasted long, Hakkai was aware because Ara was still panting when He'd severed the head off of the last threat, but Hakkai felt like he'd been fighting for ages.

He slumped foreward, stubbornly hiding his cold, angry eyes from her. Through the curtain of brunette hair, he could see her and his insatiable appetite for blood could smell her wound as well. He bit his lip to bleeding in hopes of sparring her life. He was ready to run but those tears in her rain colored orbs stopped him in his tracks.

"Hakkai!" She cried and ran to him, throwing all of her weight into a deep hug. She squeezed him so hard he gasped for breath and the familiar warmth of her body, her ample breast only he was allowed to see pressed against his broad chest, allowed himself to breath again. She wailed into his shoulder, shuddering from the chill and adrenaline, until the village had come out to see the end result.

All of the youkai members of the town, save for Hakkai and Gojyo, had gone on a rampage and then been murdered by the last full-blooded youkai. They would have eradicated the last youkai threat but Ara glared darkly and clung to the point of breaking Hakkai's hand as they bandaged her. She continued to clutch his hand even now as the slept off the emotions of the night and the predictions of the future.

* * *

He had thought leaving would be more difficult, more sad, more depressing; but somehow, Hakkai could smile without it hurting and walk…well drive away from the moderate-sized town towards the only place he knew to go…Sanzo's temple. This was a point in his life, the reason he'd survived and Kanan didn't…This was destiny.

And it should have been painful knowing his destiny wasn't with Ara.

He wasn't meant for a peaceful life, waking to her barely clothed and embarrassed by it. It wasn't his duty to marry her, impregnate her and then die happily in her arms at an old, wrinkly age. That was some unworthy human's job. A handsome and flawed man who didn't deserve her would buy her a gold ring, see her in a beautiful white dress, keep her up all night…rub her growing stomach.

He was angry, so angry he probably could kill someone, but he wasn't sad.

Because Ara would be happy with her human lover, growing old and dyeing at an age that was…expected of them. She'd be a beautiful mother to a black haired, blue eyed little girl. She'd raise the girl in her image, rough around the edges, masculine, and fierce to those with untrained eyes. Her daughter would find some poor sap like himself who'd see the ethereal beauty and would never want her to leave. Ara could die happy, watching her daughter marry, bear children and announce stubbornly that Ara couldn't spoil them.

And all of her memories of the silly monocle wearing, green-eyed fling would be the simple gold band that he'd left on the pillow next to her closed eyes.

* * *

The journey was longer and far more eventful than he could have predicted or even hoped for. The battles with youkai, the battles coming to terms with his past, the constant bickering from his other three companions; they all prevented him from the one crucial, depressing, infuriating thought that Ara was falling in love without him.

The nights he couldn't sleep, he'd fall into dark despair, imaging her smiling at someone else. He often tried to imagine the mysterious man, strikingly handsome, outwardly strong but compassionate and well aware of her feelings. Those thoughts only led him to wanting to kill something…not good when the only souls were himself and three others he was suppose to protect. Once the uncontrollably, murderous rage subsided, he could conclude that he only thought of her with someone else, he couldn't imagine her with anyone else but him. The stranger he'd dreamt up for her could only take the form of himself.

Other nights he imagined her sad, crying by the window, just as lonely as he was. It was hard to be openly happy after that moment. He never wanted to see Ara cry, she deserved something far better than that. She deserved something better than him. He noticed those thoughts made his scar burn. When the unbearable depression subsided, he could easily erase those thoughts from his mind. Ara didn't cry from sadness, she ate chocolate to soothe her depression.

He wondered, obsessed over thoughts of her. His only reprieve was the deadly fights for his life and sleep.

Always, always before he fell asleep, the reason he could sleep painlessly. He would imagine her there at her Apartment door, at the park where they first met, by Gojyo's abandoned apartment, smiling softly and whispering "Come home."

Those images felt the most right in his mind.

* * *

He laid broken, watching the others struggle desperately to defeat the fox youkai and her small band of loyalists. He couldn't feel his arm, knew his leg was broken and shattered to the point that he would have a limp for the rest of his…apparently short life.

He mused distantly that, at death, one's life passes before one's eyes. However, his life, as short and unbearably cruel, did not come before him. It was a simple flash of white, a moment of blindness before the vision took shape. It was the town, his town…his home, bustling still after all these years.

He was before a small complex, unusual and old in comparison to the tower buildings around it, a relic of the past. And there, reclining against the front window, idly playing with a yellow flower's petal, was a simply dressed woman. She wore a sleeved, soft blue working dress and knee high brown boots. She smiled softly at a red headed child, looking strange in boy's clothes, that chased a butterfly innocently. The child fell, their bright blue eyes welling up with tears and sniffling before the butterfly passed once more and the child joyfully rose up and chased it once more. The woman chuckled to herself and watched the child run.

Alone now, her face became slump, an overwhelming sadness hallowing out her perfect, angelic face. Hakkai felt himself die inside at the look on her precious face. But her eyes, the eyes the same color as rain, so blue he could have confused them with a pool of clear water, they were alight with hope and soft but powerful words fell from her thin, red lips, "Come home."

He was up without realizing it, gather all of his strength in an electrifying attack aimed right at the heart cavity of his enemies. Barely standing, barely moving, barely breathing, he struck the woman straight through the heart with pure chakra and the blinding light that followed left him disoriented.

* * *

Memories were like reading tragedies backwards. Pain had followed him throughout his earliest years, haunting his breath and dreams. But heaven, fate, the Merciful Goddess gave him reprieve. He somehow had gained favor in his life and here he stood, clutching a wooden stick to support his busted leg and limping back into the town that had changed so drastically in his absence.

His past crimes were forgiven in the eyes of heaven, even the crimes of his life 500 years ago had been retracted from their judgmental eyes. He'd be welcome into eternity when he decided death would come for him. But, for some reason, the Merciful Goddess wouldn't remove the stain of being a youkai from him. He'd pleaded with her to be human but she smiled and said it was impossible.

The town would reject him and his presence, he'd become a burden on Ara and her aging life. But he couldn't seem to care. He only wanted to hug her and promise he would never leave.

He limped to the apartment he'd seen at the end, plastered a smile on his face and found her. She reclined against the complex a soft, lonely look clouding her angelic face. Her blue eyes sparkled with love towards a small child, obviously a girl in baggy shorts and a boy's t-shirt, who was mimicking her. The girl's electrified blue eyes stared up happily at her through the veil of messy, wavy red curls. Hakkai felt himself slump with sadness, she had taken a lover.

His sigh had alerted her and she looked up instantly. Her eyes were alight with immediate recognition and joy. He saw, dangling from her ear, was a gold chain…a youkai limiter.

She ran to him, hugged him tightly and began to cry, "You came home!"

Her hug was suffocating and steel like. She'd become so strong and it took his breath away, "Y-Yeah…"

"I called every day for you!" She kissed him now, her soft lips pressed up against him so tightly that all thought truly left his mind. He simply kissed her back, deciding that nothing else mattered. She pulled back after a moment and swiftly, with inhuman speed, picked up the girl and rested her on her hip, "Hakkai, this is Karine."

Hakkai nodded, "It's a pleasure to meet you, Karine."

Karine smiled brightly, her mother's smile and almost leapt into his arms. He struggled slightly as the child clung to his side and he struggled to hold her. Ara laughed for a moment as Karine appeared like a koala attempting to grasp for eucalyptus and then she grasped Karine's loose half and complete the circle the three had made, "Hakkai, this is your daughter."

* * *

**Author's Note: **Waa~ that was the best way I could end this. I really think it's weak towards the end but as long as Repentless Wind likes it, then it's fine. If you have any request, just send them along. I'm happy to have a focus with all my creative energy.

Tell me what you think!

Zai Jian!


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